Six Guidelines for “Getting to Yes” - PON

These six integrative negotiation skills can help you on your journey of getting to yes. · 1. Separate the people from the problem. · 2. Focus on ... × PONDailyBlog PON–ProgramonNegotiationatHarvardLawSchool-https://www.pon.harvard.edu Comment IntheirrevolutionarybookGettingtoYes:NegotiatingAgreementWithoutGivingIn(Penguin,3rdedition,2011),RogerFisher,WilliamUry,andBrucePattonintroducedtheworldtothepossibilitiesofmutual-gainsnegotiation,orintegrativenegotiation.TheauthorsofGettingtoYesexplainedthatnegotiatorsdon’thavetochoosebetweeneitherwagingastrictlycompetitive,win-losenegotiationbattleorcavingintoavoidconflict. Rather,theyargued,bargainerscanandshouldlookfornegotiationstrategiesthatcanhelpbothsidesgetmoreofwhattheywant.Bylisteningcloselytoeachother,treatingeachotherfairly,andjointlyexploringoptionstoincreasevalue,negotiatorscanfindwaysofgettingtoyesthatreducetheneedtorelyonhard-bargainingtacticsandunnecessaryconcessions. ClaimyourFREEcopy:NegotiationSkills Buildpowerfulnegotiationskillsandbecomeabetterdealmakerandleader.DownloadourFREEspecialreport,NegotiationSkills:NegotiationStrategiesandNegotiationTechniquestoHelpYouBecomeaBetterNegotiator,fromtheProgramonNegotiationatHarvardLawSchool. 1.Separatethepeoplefromtheproblem. Innegotiation,it’seasytoforgetthatourcounterpartshavefeelings,opinions,values,anduniquebackgroundsthatcontributetowhattheydoandsayduringtalks.Whenmisunderstandingsandconflictariseinnegotiation,weneedtodealwiththe“peopleproblem”directlyratherthantryingtoglossoveritwithconcessions,accordingtotheauthorsofGettingtoYes.Strivetoimaginethesituationfromtheircounterpart’sviewpoint.Ifsomeoneisrefusingtobackdownfromahardlineposition,askherhowshethinksthingsaregoing.Exploringeachside’sperceptionsopenlyandavoidingthetendencytoblamearekeynegotiationskills. 2.Focusoninterests,notpositions. Wetendtobeginournegotiationbystatingourpositions.Ahomeownermightsaytoadeveloper,forinstance,“Iwon’tallowyoutodevelopthisproperty.”Whenwestakeoutfirmpositions,wesetourselvesupforimpasse.Inourgoalofgettingtoyes,weneedtodrawouttheinterestsunderlyingourcounterpart’spositionsbyaskingquestions,suchas,“Whyisthispropertyimportanttoyou?”Byidentifyingwhatinterestsaremotivatingtheotherparty,andsharingyourowninterests,youcanopenupopportunitiestoexploretradeoffsacrossissuesandincreaseyouroddsofgettingtoyes. 3.Learntomanageemotions. Besurethatyouandyourcounterparthaveampleopportunitiestoexpressanddiscussanystrongemotionsrelatedtoyournegotiation.Allowingoneanothertospeakyourmindwillbenefitbothsides.“Freedfromtheburdenofunexpressedemotions,”writetheauthorsinGettingtoYes,“peoplewillbecomemorelikelytoworkontheproblem.”Theytellthestoryofalabor-managementgroupthat“adoptedtherulethatonlyonepersoncouldgetangryatatime,”atacticthatpreventedargumentsfromescalating.Whenyouknowthatyouwillhaveyourturntoexpresshowyou’refeeling,itwillbeeasierforyoutolistenwhenyourcounterparthashisturn. 4.Expressappreciation. Throughouthiscareeratthevanguardofintegrativenegotiation,Fisherstressedtheimportanceofexpressingappreciationasameansofbreakingthroughimpasse.“Noonelikestofeelunappreciated,andthisisparticularlytrueinanegotiation,”FisheroncetoldProgramonNegotiationmanagingdirectorSusanHackley.IntheirbookBeyondReason(Penguin,2005),FisherandDanShapiroadvisednegotiatorstoexpressappreciationbyworkingtounderstandtheother’sperspective,seekingmeritinthatperspective,andcommunicatingunderstandingthroughwordsandactions—allcriticalnegotiationskills. 5.Putapositivespinonyourmessage. Communicatinginapositivewayisamuchmoreeffectivemeansofgettingtoyesthanblamingandcriticizing.Insteadofspeakingonbehalfofyourgroup,speakonlyforyourself.Forexample,saying“Everyoneontheteamfeelsthatyou’renotpullingyourweight”toanemployeeislikelytodistractherfromyourmessage,asshewillwonderwhohasbeentalkingaboutherandwhatthey’vesaid.Instead,talkaboutwhatyoupersonallyhaveobservedandexpressyourconcern:“Yourrecentworkhasfallenshortofyourhighperformancelevels.Isthereanythinggoingonthatiskeepingyoufromdoingyourbest?” 6.Escapethecycleofactionandreaction. InGettingtoYes,Fisher,Ury,andPattoncautionustoavoidthecommonnegotiationtrapofactionandreaction:“Iftheothersideannouncesafirmposition,youmaybetemptedtocriticizeandrejectit.Iftheycriticizeyourproposal,youmaybetemptedtodefenditanddigyourselfin...iftheypushyouhard,youwilltendtopushback.”Toheadoffthisviciouscycle,Fisher,Ury,andPattonintroduceanegotiationskilltheycallnegotiationjujitsu,whichinvolvesavoidingescalationbyrefusingtoreact.Instead,theyadviseustochannelourresistanceintomoreproductivenegotiationstrategies,suchas“exploringinterests,inventingoptionsformutualgain,andsearchingforindependentstandards.” Whatmethodshavehelpedinyougettingtoyes? ClaimyourFREEcopy:NegotiationSkills Buildpowerfulnegotiationskillsandbecomeabetterdealmakerandleader.DownloadourFREEspecialreport,NegotiationSkills:NegotiationStrategiesandNegotiationTechniquestoHelpYouBecomeaBetterNegotiator,fromtheProgramonNegotiationatHarvardLawSchool. RelatedPostsInBusinessDisputes,ConflictResolutionStylesCanMakeAlltheDifferenceInNegotiation,HowMuchDoPersonalityandOtherIndividualDifferencesMatter?NegotiationEthics:DealingwithDeceptionattheBargainingTableIdentifyYourNegotiationStyle:AdvancedNegotiationStrategiesandConceptsValueClaiminginNegotiation Comment Comments NoResponsesto“SixGuidelinesfor“GettingtoYes”” Ithasbeenextremelyusefulvisitofyourwebsiteandihavelearnedhowtobeasuccessfulnegotiatorinacriticalsituationbeinganadministratorinciviladministration Reply Thankyouforagoodsummaryreminderofthekeyinteractionapproaches,giveninthebook,”GettingtoYes”.Itisawonderfullyusefulbookwhicheveryintelligenthumanbeingshouldreadinhis/herlifetime…andpractiseitsmentionedgoldenprinciplesofnegotiation… Reply Thankyouforteachingrequiredskillstonegotiateinadifficultsituatio. Reply Yourwebsitestates“RogerFisher,WilliamUry,andBrucePattonintroducedtheworldtothepossibilitiesofmutual-gainsnegotiation,orintegrativenegotiation.” Backin1965WaltonandMcKersie’spioneeringstudyBehavioralTheoryofLaborNegotiationsclearlyarticulatedwhattheycalled“integrativebargaining”withtacticssuchasmutualagreementontheproblem,mutualexchangeofinformation,mutualtrustandsearchforthebestalternative.Soundfamiliar?GettingtoYesdidnotacknowledgeWaltonandMcKersie’sbookalthougheverybookIhaveeveryreadoncollectivebargainingdoes.GettingtoYesusesthephrase“besoftonthepeopleandhardontheproblem.”Asanexample,WaltonandMcKersiequotedM.Gandhi:behardontheantagonismandsoftontheantagonist. Reply Thankyouforsharingthissummary.Ithasansweredmyquestions.OneofmyquestionswasthatwhyIwas100%successfulinsomenegotiation,andIwasnotsuccessfulinothers?Myperceptionwasthattheproblemscomefromcounterparts.However,afterreadingthissummery,Iunderstandthattheproblemisaboutme.IhavelearnedthatIamtheHardNegotiator.So,whenIamdealingwithSoftNegotiator,Iamthewinner.Otherwise,whenIamdealingwithHardNegotiator,Iamnotabletoreachtomygoals.Inaddition,IhavelearnedNegotiationistheskillthatIshouldpracticeittoimprovethat.Finally,thislearningprocesstaughtmethatthePrincipledNegotiatorhavepracticedtheskillsandprepareforthemeetingbeforethat. Reply Thanksforallyourgoodwork–andsharingitsoopenly.I’mnotsureifthere’sanameforthis,butIuseatechniquethatseemsveryhelpfulwhenI’mhelpinggroupsnegotiateagreements–thatis,startingwithtestingsimpleagreementsandthenmovingprogressivelytowardthemorechallengingagreements.Thatmightbestartingwith“SoI’mhearingthatweallbelievethatweneedtoresolvethisissue.Isthatright?”Ifindthatit’shelpfulbecauseitpointsoutthatwedoagreeonsomethingsandwe’remakingprogressandmovingforwardtowardresolution.It’salsohelpfulbecauseithelpsmeunderstandwherethepointofdivergenceandconvergenceis,soIcanfocusthenegotiationmoreclearly. Reply Thethingthathasreallyhelpedmynegotiationskillhasbeentoask,“Whywouldmycounterpartacceptthisproposal?” Notonlyhasthishelpedtoachievemoreobjectives,butithasalsobenefittedmyempathytowardstheotherparty’ssituation. Reply Clickheretocancelreply. LeaveaReplyCancelreplyYouremailaddresswillnotbepublished.Requiredfieldsaremarked*Name* Email* Website Savemyname,email,andwebsiteinthisbrowserforthenexttimeIcomment. 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