Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In

“Getting to Yes” is the benchmark by which all other books on negotiating should be judged. Authors Fisher, Patton and Ury have penned a book that has ... Goodreadshelpsyoukeeptrackofbooksyouwanttoread. Startbymarking“GettingtoYes:NegotiatingAgreementWithoutGivingIn”asWanttoRead: WanttoRead saving… WanttoRead CurrentlyReading Read Othereditions Enlargecover WanttoRead saving… Errorratingbook.Refreshandtryagain. Ratethisbook Clearrating 1of5stars2of5stars3of5stars4of5stars5of5stars OpenPreview SeeaProblem? We’dloveyourhelp. Letusknowwhat’swrongwiththispreviewof GettingtoYesbyRogerFisher. Problem: It’sthewrongbook It’sthewrongedition Other Details(ifother):   Cancel Thanksfortellingusabouttheproblem. ReturntoBookPage Notthebookyou’relookingfor? Preview—GettingtoYes byRogerFisher GettingtoYes:NegotiatingAgreementWithoutGivingIn by RogerFisher, WilliamUry, BrucePatton 3.94  ·  Ratingdetails ·  69,022 ratings  ·  2,130 reviews Describesamethodofnegotiationthatisolatesproblems,focusesoninterests,createsnewoptions,andusesobjectivecriteriatohelptwopartiesreachanagreementAmazon.comdescription:ProductDescription:Sinceitsoriginalpublicationnearlythirtyyearsago,GettingtoYeshashelpedmillionsofpeoplelearnabetterwaytonegotiate.Oneoftheprimarybusiness Describesamethodofnegotiationthatisolatesproblems,focusesoninterests,createsnewoptions,andusesobjectivecriteriatohelptwopartiesreachanagreementAmazon.comdescription:ProductDescription:Sinceitsoriginalpublicationnearlythirtyyearsago,GettingtoYeshashelpedmillionsofpeoplelearnabetterwaytonegotiate.Oneoftheprimarybusinesstextsofthemodernera,itisbasedontheworkoftheHarvardNegotiationProject,agroupthatdealswithalllevelsofnegotiationandconflictresolution.GettingtoYesoffersaproven,step-by-stepstrategyforcomingtomutuallyacceptableagreementsineverysortofconflict.Thoroughlyupdatedandrevised,itoffersreadersastraight-forward,universallyapplicablemethodfornegotiatingpersonalandprofessionaldisputeswithoutgettingangry-orgettingtaken.ThisisbyfarthebestthingI`veeverreadaboutnegotiation.Itisequallyrelevantfortheindividualwhowouldliketokeephisfriends,property,andincomeandthestatesmanwhowouldliketokeepthepeace."--JohnKennethGalbraith" ...more GetACopy AmazonOnlineStores ▾AudibleBarnes&NobleWalmarteBooksAppleBooksGooglePlayAbebooksBookDepositoryAlibrisIndigoBetterWorldBooksIndieBoundThriftbooksBookLinks ▾LibrariesElaAreaPublicLibrary Paperback,SecondEdition,224pages Published December1st1991 byPenguinGroup (firstpublished1981) MoreDetails... OriginalTitle GettingtoYes:NegotiatingAgreementWithoutGivingIn ISBN 0140157352 (ISBN13:9780140157352) EditionLanguage English OtherEditions(50) AllEditions | AddaNewEdition | Combine ...LessDetail EditDetails FriendReviews Toseewhatyourfriendsthoughtofthisbook, pleasesignup. ReaderQ&A Toaskotherreadersquestionsabout GettingtoYes, pleasesignup. PopularAnsweredQuestions howtodownloadthisbook? 4likes · like 5yearsago Seeall2answers DheerajRemella Hithere.Iknowithasbeenawhile.Butifyouwantthegistofit:http://www.pwsausa.org/wp-content/upl...Butreadingthebookinitsentiretyis…moreHithere.Iknowithasbeenawhile.Butifyouwantthegistofit:http://www.pwsausa.org/wp-content/upl...Butreadingthebookinitsentiretyisanexperienceofitsown.Iamabouttofinishitup.BTW,Iamnotpromotingthebookoranythinglikethat.Ijustreallylikedtheexamplesthattheyworkthroughforthevariousconceptstheyintroduce.Hopeyoufindwhatyouarelookingfor-Cheers.(less) flag Seeall6questionsaboutGettingtoYes… ListswithThisBook BestBusinessBooks 889books — 1,636voters BooksEveryBusinesspersonShouldRead 463books — 497voters Morelistswiththisbook... CommunityReviews Showing1-30 Averagerating 3.94  ·  Ratingdetails  ·  69,022 ratings  ·  2,130 reviews AllLanguagesBahasaIndonesia‎(6) Dansk‎(1) Deutsch‎(8) Eesti‎(1) English‎(1995) Español‎(21) Français‎(2) Italiano‎(6) Latviešuvaloda‎(1) Nederlands‎(2) Polski‎(2) Português‎(10) Pусскийязык‎(8) Suomi‎(2) česky,čeština‎(2) українська‎(3) العربية‎(5) فارسی‎(3) ไทย‎(2) 中文‎(1) Morefilters  |  Sortorder StartyourreviewofGettingtoYes:NegotiatingAgreementWithoutGivingInWriteareview Feb03,2017 AlwaysPouting ratedit likedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition ThebooksokayIguessbutalotofthestrategiesaresointuitiveandthewritingwasn'tthegreatest.Againit'sthesamethingwithallthesebusinessbookswhereifyou'vereadonetherestusuallydon'taddanythingnewbutifyouhaven'treadanyitcouldbeinsightful.Thesebooksareusuallyjustusefulforhelpingorganizeonesthoughtsandrealizethingstheycouldn'totherwisebutyoucanachievethatwithsomequitethinkingtimealso. ThebooksokayIguessbutalotofthestrategiesaresointuitiveandthewritingwasn'tthegreatest.Againit'sthesamethingwithallthesebusinessbookswhereifyou'vereadonetherestusuallydon'taddanythingnewbutifyouhaven'treadanyitcouldbeinsightful.Thesebooksareusuallyjustusefulforhelpingorganizeonesthoughtsandrealizethingstheycouldn'totherwisebutyoucanachievethatwithsomequitethinkingtimealso. ...more flag 94likes · Like  · seereview Viewall7comments Sep17,2012 Dolly ratedit likedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition Recommendsitfor: negotiators Shelves: 2012, nonfiction, africa, pakistan, military, iraq, russia, library, jewish-israel, czech-republic IattendedaclassonInternationalNegotiationsattheForeignServiceInstitutethisweekandwewereassignedthisbooktoreadfortheclass.IthoughtthebookwasratherstraightforwardandIlikedtheanecdotes.Overall,Ithinkitwasagoodselectionforourclassandhelpedtoemphasizethepointsbeingtaught.IdoubtIwillbecomeamasternegotiator,butIdoseebenefitsfromthisbookandclassinmypersonallife.SomeofthelessonsIlearnedinclassincludethefollowing:"Peop IattendedaclassonInternationalNegotiationsattheForeignServiceInstitutethisweekandwewereassignedthisbooktoreadfortheclass.IthoughtthebookwasratherstraightforwardandIlikedtheanecdotes.Overall,Ithinkitwasagoodselectionforourclassandhelpedtoemphasizethepointsbeingtaught.IdoubtIwillbecomeamasternegotiator,butIdoseebenefitsfromthisbookandclassinmypersonallife.SomeofthelessonsIlearnedinclassincludethefollowing:"Peoplewon'tletyouchangetheirmindunlesstheytrustyou."ThomasColosi"Treateverymeetingasanegotiation."ThomasColosi"Peoplewhoonlyusetheformalnegotiationprocesswillnotoftenbeverysuccessful."ThomasColosi"Firstruleofnegotiating:Benice."CarmenSuro-Bredieinterestingquotesfromthebook:"Agenerationago,theterm'negotiation'alsohadanadversarialconotation.Incontemplatinganegotiation,thecommonquestioninpeople'smindswas'Whoisgoingtowinandwhoisgoingtolose?'Toreachanagreementsomeonehadto'givein.'Itwasnotapleasantprospect.Theideathatbothsidescouldbenefit,thatbothcould'win,'wasforeigntomanyofus.Nowitisincreasinglyrecognizedthattherearecooperativewaysofnegotiatingoverdifferencesandthatevenifa'win-win'solutioncannotbefound,awiseagreementcanstilloftenbereachedthatisbetterforbothsidesthanthealternative."(p.xii)"Inanegotiation,particularlyinabitterdispute,feelingsmaybemoreimportantthantalk."(p.31)"Anapologymaybeoneoftheleastcostlyandmostrewardinginvestmentsyoucanmake."(p.35)"Nomatterhowmanypeopleareinvolvedinanegotiation,importantdecisionsaretypicallymadewhennomorethantwopeopleareintheroom."(p.38)"Ifyouwantsomeonetolistenandunderstandyourreasoning,giveyourinterestsandreasoningfirstandyourconclusionsorproposalslater."(p.54)"Fewthingsfacilitateadecisionasmuchasprecedent."(p.80)"Inshort,theapproachiscommityourselftoreachingasolutionbasedonprinciple,notpressure.Concentrateonthemeritsoftheproblem,notthemettleoftheparties.Beopentoreason,butclosedtothreats."(p.84)"Someofthemosteffectivenegotiatingyouwilleverdoiswhenyouarenottalking."(p.114)"Somepartieslockedintoadversarialrutsseemunabletoconsideralternativeapproachesuntiltheyreachthebrinkofmutualannihilation,andsomenoteventhen."(p.155)"Beforeyouevenbegintonegotiate,itmakessensetoenvisionwhatasuccessfulagreementmightlooklike."(p.175) ...more flag 66likes · Like  · seereview View2comments Aug04,2008 BobSelden ratedit itwasamazing “GettingtoYes”isthebenchmarkbywhichallotherbooksonnegotiatingshouldbejudged.AuthorsFisher,PattonandUryhavepennedabookthathasbecomeaclassicinitsclassastheirnegotiatingprincipleshavebeenusedandquotedagainandagaintheworldover.“GettingtoYes”isquitedeceptiveatfirst–itseemsalittlelightweightasitissoeasytoread.Infactonecouldreaditfromcovertocoverinhalfadayquiteeasily.Yet,thefourprinciplesoutlinedintheirnegotiat “GettingtoYes”isthebenchmarkbywhichallotherbooksonnegotiatingshouldbejudged.AuthorsFisher,PattonandUryhavepennedabookthathasbecomeaclassicinitsclassastheirnegotiatingprincipleshavebeenusedandquotedagainandagaintheworldover.“GettingtoYes”isquitedeceptiveatfirst–itseemsalittlelightweightasitissoeasytoread.Infactonecouldreaditfromcovertocoverinhalfadayquiteeasily.Yet,thefourprinciplesoutlinedintheirnegotiatingmethodwhilstsimpleinnaturearecomprehensiveandeffective.Thisisoneofthefirstbooksonnegotiatingtobreakawayfromthe“hardv’ssoft”negotiatingparadigmbyintroducing“principled”negotiating–ie.negotiatingonthebasisofbothparty’sneeds,notpositions.Fisheretal,alsocoververywellthe“Whatif”situationswheretheotherpartymaybemorepowerful,usesdirtytricksorwon’tplaythegame.Thisbookshouldbeessentialreadingforeveryonewhohastonegotiatewithsomeoneelseoverreachingadecision–andisn’tthatallofus? ...more flag 48likes · Like  · seereview Jun17,2012 C ratedit reallylikedit Shelves: non-fiction, business Thisbookisaveryusefulanddetailedguidetonegotiatingformutualgain.It’samixoftheory,application,andexamples.Theadviceisrealistic;itsaystobeoptimisticbutawareofyourlimits.I’veseenthisbookmentionedinmagazineslikeInc.andEntrepreneur,andafewbusinessandsalesbooks.IfinallydecidedtoreaditwhenitwasrecommendedonThisWeekinWebDesign.Mainideas•Understandempatheticallytheirpointofview.•Explainyourinterestsandreasoningbeforepres Thisbookisaveryusefulanddetailedguidetonegotiatingformutualgain.It’samixoftheory,application,andexamples.Theadviceisrealistic;itsaystobeoptimisticbutawareofyourlimits.I’veseenthisbookmentionedinmagazineslikeInc.andEntrepreneur,andafewbusinessandsalesbooks.IfinallydecidedtoreaditwhenitwasrecommendedonThisWeekinWebDesign.Mainideas•Understandempatheticallytheirpointofview.•Explainyourinterestsandreasoningbeforepresentingyourproposal.Otherwise,theymaynotlistentoyourreasoning.•Neveryieldtopressure;onlytoprinciple.•Expandthepie,don’tsimplydivideit.Aimformutualgain.•Negotiatetostrengthentherelationship,notstrainit.SeparatethePeoplefromtheProblem•Don’tblame.•Involvetheminthedecision-makingprocess.•Talkaboutbothsides’emotions.•Anapologydefusesemotions,evenifyoudon’ttakepersonalresponsibilityforthesituation.•Describehowtheproblemaffectsyou,ratherthanaccusingthem.•Sitandactside-by-side,notface-to-face.FocusonInterests,NotPositions•Showthatyouunderstandtheirinterests.•Don’targueaboutthepast;decideonthefuture.InventOptionsforMutualGain•Shrinkthescopeofaproposaltoreduceperceivedrisk;offeratrialphase.•Offersareusuallymoreeffectivethanthreats.InsistonUsingObjectiveCriteria•Frameeachissueasajointsearchforobjectivecriteria.Ask“What’syourtheory?”or“howdidyouarriveatthatproposal?”•Agreeonstandardsbeforenegotiating.•Gotoathirdpartyifnecessary.DevelopYourBATNA•YourBATNA(bestalternativetoanegotiatedagreement)helpsdeterminetheminimallyacceptableagreement,andwilllikelyraisethatminimum.NegotiationNinjitsu•Invitecriticismaboutyourproposal;askwhatthey’ddoinyoursituation.•Usequestions,notstatements.•Besilentaftertheygiveanunsatisfactoryanswer;they’llfeelcompelledtore-answer.•Say,“pleasecorrectmeifI’mwrong”toappearopentocorrection.•Expressgratitudeforwhatthey’vedonesofar.Say,“Iappreciatewhatyou’vedone.”•It’snotaquestionoftrust,it’saquestionofprinciple.•Giveacrediblereasonfortakingabreakfromnegotiating,suchastalkingitoverwithanother.TamingtheHardBargainer•Whensomeoneusestheir“hardheartedpartner”asanexcuse,firstgettheircommitmentinwriting,thenasktospeaktothepartner.TenQuestionsPeopleAsk•Negotiatingdoesn’trequirecompromisingyourprinciples.Findasolutionconsistentwithbothsides’principles.•Proposeyouropeningfigureasasuggestionbasedonobjectivestandards,notafirmposition.•Themoreyoutryfor,themoreyou’relikelytoget. ...more flag 21likes · Like  · seereview Viewall5comments Jun18,2017 Katie ratedit reallylikedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition Thisisa3.5forme.WhydidIlikeGettingPastNobetter?Ithinkit'sbecauseI'vebeentoldNOalotmoreinmylife.Youwanttojointhevarsitysoccerteam?No.Youwantustohireyou?No.Youwantaffordablerent?No.Therewasasolidtrendthereforabout15years.There'splentyofapplicableknowledgeinGettingtoYes,buttheauthorsevenadmitattheendofthebookthatyouprobablyalreadyknewitall:Thisisintendedtobeaframeworktohelpyoudefineandpracticewhatyou Thisisa3.5forme.WhydidIlikeGettingPastNobetter?Ithinkit'sbecauseI'vebeentoldNOalotmoreinmylife.Youwanttojointhevarsitysoccerteam?No.Youwantustohireyou?No.Youwantaffordablerent?No.Therewasasolidtrendthereforabout15years.There'splentyofapplicableknowledgeinGettingtoYes,buttheauthorsevenadmitattheendofthebookthatyouprobablyalreadyknewitall:Thisisintendedtobeaframeworktohelpyoudefineandpracticewhatyouknow.Itwasusefultoseedifferentnegotiatingtechniquesoutlined(hard,soft,andprincipled),aswellaswhentousethem.Ialsolikealotofthegeneralteachingsaroundwhatyoushouldfocusonwhennegotiating:-Separatepeoplefromtheproblem-Focusoninterests,notpositions-Inventoptionsformutualgain-Insistonusingobjectivecriteria-Andasalastresort,haveaBATNA(BestAlternativetoaNegotiatedAgreement)Therearesomegreatgeneraltipsaroundtheseteachings(likeunderstandingyouropponent'sBATNA).IprobablywouldhaveratedthishigherifI'dreaditinhighschool...andIwishIhaddonesobackthenforalotofreasons. ...more flag 16likes · Like  · seereview Jul25,2015 Fiona ratedit reallylikedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition Shelves: i-also-read-nonfiction-occasionally, protodidact, read-in-2015, work-not-teaching Badnews,everybody:I'veturnedintoabore.Youcantell,becauseonmyfirstweekendofNoWorkAtAllinaboutsixweeks,hereIam,readingaguidetonegotiation,covertocover.It'sofficial:InowdoCPDforfun.Wouldyouwanttotalktomeataparty?Iwouldn't.Whichiskindofashame,becausethisisprettygood.Fullofexcellentadvice,usefulscriptsandcontingencyplans.AnecdotesfromeverythingbetweenleasenegotiationsandthepreparatorytalksfortheLawoftheSeaConve Badnews,everybody:I'veturnedintoabore.Youcantell,becauseonmyfirstweekendofNoWorkAtAllinaboutsixweeks,hereIam,readingaguidetonegotiation,covertocover.It'sofficial:InowdoCPDforfun.Wouldyouwanttotalktomeataparty?Iwouldn't.Whichiskindofashame,becausethisisprettygood.Fullofexcellentadvice,usefulscriptsandcontingencyplans.AnecdotesfromeverythingbetweenleasenegotiationsandthepreparatorytalksfortheLawoftheSeaConvention.(Thisinternationallawgraduateparticularlyenjoyedthosebits.)Itwaswelllaidout,andwellwritten-clearlybysomeonewhocanthinkofnothingmorefunthanthreeconsecutivedayssatroundatablebrainstormingideas.Itwasn'tludicrouslychirpyorfullofbuzzwords.Itdidn'ttrytomakecommonsensesoundlikepseudoscience(lookingatyou,SevenSuccessfulHabits).It'sreallynicetocomeacrossabookaboutnegotiationthatvaluescollaboration,caresaboutpeople'sindividualinterestsandfeelings,doesn'twantanyonetogetshafted.Ilovethatit'snotevenspecifictocommercialcontexts:it'swritteninawaythatemphasisedinjectingfairnessintoallsortsofcommunications,likepartners,landlords,insurers.Therewashardlyanyhotairatall,I'mastonished.IhaveafeelingI'mgoingtocomebacktothisoften-andsoshouldyou,youknow. ...more flag 15likes · Like  · seereview Jan21,2013 RobertoSuarez ratedit reallylikedit Afterreading"GettingtoYes",Irealizedthe"bottomline"tonegotiationisnotthemosteffectiveapproachtogettowhateveryonewantsanditsnottoseethenegotiationgameasawin/loseexperience,butawaytodeveloprelationships.Similartoplayingfrisbeeandtherelationshipofmarriage,therearescenariosthathavenoplaceforwin/losenegotiationsbecauseultimatelytheywillallendwithlose/loseresults.Individualsshouldfocus,"Tobebetter,theprocessmust,ofcourse, Afterreading"GettingtoYes",Irealizedthe"bottomline"tonegotiationisnotthemosteffectiveapproachtogettowhateveryonewantsanditsnottoseethenegotiationgameasawin/loseexperience,butawaytodeveloprelationships.Similartoplayingfrisbeeandtherelationshipofmarriage,therearescenariosthathavenoplaceforwin/losenegotiationsbecauseultimatelytheywillallendwithlose/loseresults.Individualsshouldfocus,"Tobebetter,theprocessmust,ofcourse,producegoodsubstantiveresults;winningonthemeritsmaynotbetheonlygoal,butcertainlylosingisnottheanswer."Therefore,itisbettertounderstandtheinterestsofwhatunderlynegotiationrequests.It'snotenoughtoknowthefactsofwhat'sbeingnegotiated,becausealternativescannotbegenerated.KnowingyourBATNAwill"probablyraiseyourminimum".Askingquestionstofindoutmoreaboutanindividual(s)position/interest,ismoreproductivetocometoalternativeresultsthatleadstowin/winresults. ...more flag 12likes · Like  · seereview Sep13,2014 Trevor(Isometimesgetnotifiedofcomments) ratedit likedit Shelves: psychology Ireadthisbookyearsandyearsagoandthen,recently,IwashelpingtowriteanarticleonAsialiteracyandhowthisistreatedintheAustralianmediaandoneofthethingsthatstruckmewashowmuchwaswrittenabouthowAustraliawouldbenefiteconomicallyfromaboomingAsia,buthowlittlewaswrittenabouthowAsiamightbenefitfromhavingarelationshipwithAustralia.Oneofthethingsthisbooktellsyouoverandoveragainisthattoreallynegotiateyouneedtospendatleastas Ireadthisbookyearsandyearsagoandthen,recently,IwashelpingtowriteanarticleonAsialiteracyandhowthisistreatedintheAustralianmediaandoneofthethingsthatstruckmewashowmuchwaswrittenabouthowAustraliawouldbenefiteconomicallyfromaboomingAsia,buthowlittlewaswrittenabouthowAsiamightbenefitfromhavingarelationshipwithAustralia.Oneofthethingsthisbooktellsyouoverandoveragainisthattoreallynegotiateyouneedtospendatleastasmuchtimethinkingabout‘their’positionasyoudothinkingabout‘yours’.Thereisalotofthisthatisreallyworthwhile.Itiswrittenasakindofself-helpbook–andImeanthatnegatively,butitwasachoicetheymadeandsoyouhavetoacceptthat,inasense.Oneofthebestpiecesofadviceinthisisthatifyouaregoingtonegotiateethically,youneedtofocuson‘reasons’.Thatis,trytokeepthediscussiononwhysomethingisfairorwhatotherpeoplehavedonewhichcanbeusedasastandardfornegotiations.Now,Ifoundthisbookhardgoingthistime.MostlybecauseIworkedasanegotiatorforatradeunionfulltimefor8yearsandasaseniordelegatefor20andthisbroughtbackfartoomanybadmemories.AndwhileIreallydounderstandthatthetechniquesdiscussedhereareveryuseful,thereactuallyaretimeswhentherearenoobjectivemeasuresbywhichtoconductnegotiations.Thisisparticularlytruewhenyouaretryingtonegotiatefor‘better’conditionsandwages.Thenreferencestowhathasgonebeforeandwhatisconsistentwiththatsimplytiethenegotiationsdownandmeanyoucanneverexpectanybetter-whichispreciselywhymanagementseektousethatasatechnique.AtoneofthelastnegotiationsIwasinvolvedinthe'goldstandard'thatwasofferedwaseconomistsperceptionofthelikelyrateofinflationin12monthstotwoyearsfromthetimeofthenegotiation.Thiswas2009-immediatelyaftervirtuallynotasingleeconomisthadpredictedtheGFC.Finding'goldstandards'withthisstuffsometimescanbearealchallenge.But,thatsaid,youprobablyaren’tgoingtoreallybedoingindustrialnegotiations,youaremuchmorelikelytobedoingnegotiationsinvolvingspousesorkidsoryourlocalmechanic.Andthetechniquesusedhereforframingthenegotiationsandforteachingyouwaystoremaincalmarereally,reallyuseful.Allthesame,theself-helpbookstyleofthisoneisabithardtotake.Sothisisbasicallysomereallygoodadvicesaidinjustabouttheworstwaypossible. ...more flag 9likes · Like  · seereview Jul29,2011 Mike ratedit itwasamazing Thisbookwasrecommendedtomebyaboutadozenfriends,colleagues,andprofessorsbeforeIfinallydecidedtoreadit.GettingtoYeswasagoodmixbetweentextbooktechniqueandanecdotalevidenceinnegotiations.Ittaughtmetoseparatethepeoplefromtheproblemandtostrivetowardcommonintereststocreateawin-winrelationshipinsteadofplayingagameofpositioningforawin-losescenario.Idefinitelyrecommendittoanyonewhoworksforaliving,anyonewhopaysrentoramort Thisbookwasrecommendedtomebyaboutadozenfriends,colleagues,andprofessorsbeforeIfinallydecidedtoreadit.GettingtoYeswasagoodmixbetweentextbooktechniqueandanecdotalevidenceinnegotiations.Ittaughtmetoseparatethepeoplefromtheproblemandtostrivetowardcommonintereststocreateawin-winrelationshipinsteadofplayingagameofpositioningforawin-losescenario.Idefinitelyrecommendittoanyonewhoworksforaliving,anyonewhopaysrentoramortgage,anyonewhohasasignificantotherorspouse,anyonewithsiblings,andthelistgoeson,basicallyeveryoneshouldreadthisbook.Herearesomeofmyfavoritequotesfromthebook:-Besoftonthepeoplebuthardontheissueathand-Howyouseetheworlddependsonwhereyousit-Understandingsomeone'spointofviewisnotthesameasagreeingwithit-Anopenmindisnotthesamethingasanemptyone-Silenceisoneofyourbestweapons...useit.-Ifyouwantahorsetojumpafence,don'tfirstraisethefence-Beopentoreasonandclosedtothreats-Neveryieldtopressure,yieldonlytoreason-Dealwithpeopleashumanbeingsandjudgetheproblembasedonitsmerits-Conflictdoesnotlayinobjectiverealitybutratherinpeople'sheads-Thereasonyounegotiateistoproducesomethingbetterthanyoucouldobtainwithoutnegotiating-NegotiatingJujitsu(readthebooktolearnwhatthisis,it'sagreatconcept) ...more flag 9likes · Like  · seereview Mar31,2021 YevgeniyBrikman ratedit itwasamazing Icanseewhythisbookissofamous.It'soneofthoserarebusinessbooksthathasnofillermaterial:it'sconcise,tothepoint,andstuffedfullofpowerfulideasandinsights.Wellworthreadingforanyone,asnegotiationskillsareusefulinallaspectsoflife,andnotjustbusiness:e.g.,buyingahouse,gettingabetterjoboffer,convincingyourkidstodosomething,etcallrequirenegotiation.SomekeyinsightsIgotfromthisbook:(A)Don'tusepositionalbargaining,whereyoutoss Icanseewhythisbookissofamous.It'soneofthoserarebusinessbooksthathasnofillermaterial:it'sconcise,tothepoint,andstuffedfullofpowerfulideasandinsights.Wellworthreadingforanyone,asnegotiationskillsareusefulinallaspectsoflife,andnotjustbusiness:e.g.,buyingahouse,gettingabetterjoboffer,convincingyourkidstodosomething,etcallrequirenegotiation.SomekeyinsightsIgotfromthisbook:(A)Don'tusepositionalbargaining,whereyoutossoffersbackandforthanddefendpositions(thisisthedefaultformostpeople).E.g.,"I'llgiveyou$20.""What?It'sworthatleast$100!""$100forthisoldthing?Noway.BestIcandois$25.""It'snotold,it'saclassic.$95.""Butit'sdirty!I'llhavetospendtimecleaningit.Nowayit'sworthmorethan$30.""It'saone-of-a-kind.$90."Andsoonandsoforth.Thisapproachisineffective,asallyou'redoingisgettingmoreandmoreentrenchedinyourpositions,andonceentrenched,youthendefendthosepositions,notbecausetheyleadtoabetterdealforyou,butbecauseyouwanttosaveface.Eachsideinsuchanegotiationdoesalotofposturing,takesextremepositions,onlyofferssmallconcessions,andthenegotiationoftentakesforeverasaresult.Worstofall,evenifyoudocometoanagreement,thissortofprocesscanbebruising,hurtingyourrelationshipanderodingtrust.(B)Instead,useprinciplednegotiation.Thisisbasedon5principles:1.Separatethepeoplefromtheproblem2.Focusoninterests,notpositions3.Inventoptionsformutualgain4.Insistonusingobjectivecriteria5.KnowyourBATNAI'lldiveintoeachofthesenext.(C)Separatethepeoplefromtheproblem.Allnegotiationsaredonebypeople,andifyoudon'ttakeintoaccountthewaypeoplethink,feel,andcommunicate,youwillnotbeaneffectivenegotiator.-Attacktheproblem;nevertheperson.Ideally,youbothseethenegotiationasaproblemyousolvejointly.E.g.,Ifyou'renegotiatingajoboffer,insteadofthinkingofitasyouvstheemployer,thinkoftheproblemas"howdowebuildsomethinggreattogether"thatyouandtheemployeraresolvingtogether.-Howapersonfeelsduringthenegotiation—notthefacts,notthepositions,notthepowerrelationship,buthowtheyfeel—isoftenthemostimportantaspectindeterminingtheoutcome.Dismissthefeelingsofothersatyourperil.-Trytogivetheothersideawin.Thereareoftenthingsyou're"obviously"willingtoconcedeinanegotiation;don'tassumethoseareobvious,butcallthemoutexplicitlyinstead,togivetheothersideaneasywin.Lookforwinsfortheothersidethatarecheapforyoutoconcede,butvaluableforthem.Similarly,lettheothersidesaveface.You'refarmorelikelytogettheconcessionsyouwantifyoucangivetheothersideawaytoconcedethosethingswithoutputtingtheirreputationorpersonalidentityatstake.-Listenactively.Thatmeansacknowledgingwhattheotherpersonissaying,andrepeatingitbacktotheminyourownwordstomakesureyou'veunderstoodthem.Understandingtheothersideisnotthesameasagreeingwiththem.Makingtheotherpersonfeelliketheyhavebeenheardandunderstoodisperhapsthecheapestconcessionyoucanmake.-Whenexpressingyourfeelings,focusonhowtheyaffectyou,ratherthanattackingtheotherperson.Forexample,insteadof,"youarearacist,"try,"Ifeeldiscriminatedagainst."Ifyouattacktheotherperson,theywillbecomedefensive,andpushback;ifyouexpresshowthatthingmakesyoufeel,there'snotmuchtheycanargueagainst,butitstilldeliversthesameinformation.-Whenpresentinginformation,rememberthattheword"but"isthegreateraser:itnegateseverythingthatcamebeforeit.Trytouse"and"instead.E.g.,"Yourofferof$100Kisverygenerous,butIcan'tacceptitunlessyoualsoadd4weeksofvacationtime"makesthegeneroussoundlikemeaninglessflattery.Whereas"Yourofferof$100Kisverygenerous,andI'llbethrilledtoacceptitifwecanadd4weeksofvacationtime"makesthegeneroussoundlikewhyyouwanttoaccepttheoffer.(D)Focusoninterests,notpositions.Behindeverypositionsomeonetakesinanegotiation,suchas"I'llonlysellthisfor$100,"therearesomeunderlyingintereststhattheyaretryingtomeet,suchas,"Ipaid$85foritandneedtomakeaprofitorIgooutofbusiness."Mostnegotiationsshouldfocusonflushingouttheinterestsofbothparties,ratherthanpositions.-Knowingtheunderlyinginterestsincreasesthechancesoffindingasolutionthatmakeseveryonehappywithoutresortingtoacompromisethatdoesn'tmakeanyonehappy.ThiswasthesamepointinNeverSplittheDifference.You'lloftenfindthatthereareinterestsyoucanmeetfortheothersideatlittlecosttoyou,andthattheothersidecanmeetforyouatlittlecosttothem,leadingtoabetterdealforeveryone.Forexample,whennegotiatingajoboffer,ifyoujusttossbackandforthsalarynumbers,youareunlikelytogetaresultthatmakeseveryonehappy.Butifyouflushouttheinterests,youmayfindoutthattheemployer'sinterestsarearoundbeingabletogetgreatemployeesforalongtimewhileminimizingcashspend,whiletheemployee'sinterestsarearoundagoodwork-lifebalance;youcanthenshiftthenegotiationtodiscussingequityandPTO,leadingtoanofferthatworksbetterforeveryone.(E)Inventoptionsformutualgain.Onceyouknoweveryone'sinterests,thenextstepistotrytocomeupwithasmanyoptionsasyoucanthatcouldpossiblymeeteveryone'sinterests.-Manypeoplethinkofnegotiationasazero-sumgame,whereifyougetmore,Igetless,butthat'srarelythecase.Inmostnegotiations,therearemanywaystogrowthepiebeforesplittingit.Don'tassumethere'sjustonesolution;instead,beopentoexploringoptions,andyou'doftenbesurprisedwhatyou'llfind.Example:twopeopleareinalibrary,andonewantsthewindowopen,whiletheotherwantsitclosed.Thisseemslikeazero-sumgame,whereifonewinsandtheotherloses,butitmightnotbe!Forexample,ifyoustartwiththeunderlyingneeds,youmayfindthepersonwhowantsitopenisinterestedinfreshair,whilethepersonthatwantsitclosedisinterestedinavoidingadraftthatwouldblowpapersallovertheplace.Ifyouthenstarttossingoptionsout,youmaydiscoveronethatmakesbothpartieshappy:openawindowinanotherroom!Thisgivesyoufreshairwithoutthedraft.Bothpartieswin.-Youshouldexplicitlytrytoseparatetheprocessofcomingupwithoptionsfromtheprocessofdeciding.Forexample,youcanhaveabrainstormingsessionwhere(a)everyoneisencouragedtotossoutideas,(b)nooneiscommittinginanywaytoanydecisionduringthebrainstormingsession,(c)infact,nooneisallowedtojudgeorcriticizeideasatallduringthebrainstormingsession.Thepointistoencouragecomingupwithasmanyideasasyoucan,nomatterhowwildorcrazy.Ideastendtobuildoneachother,leadingtofarbetteroptionsthanyoumayhaveoriginallyconsidered.Thisprocessworksbestifyouarebothsittingonthesamesideofthetable,facingawhiteboard,asyoutossoutideas.Infact,sittingonthesamesideofthetableisagoodideaingeneralinanegotiation,asit'llmakeyoufeellikeyou'reworkingonaproblemtogether,ratherthanagainsteachother("separatethepeoplefromtheproblem").-Asyoutossoutoptions,makesureyouunderstandwhatdecisiontheothersideisreallymaking.Thatis,thepersonyou'renegotiatingwithdirectlyisrarelytheonlypartyinvolved.Theyalmostalwayshavetoconvincesomeoneelse—aboss,aspouse,acolleague,etc.Makesureyouunderstandwhotheseotherpartiesare,andgivethepersonyou'renegotiatingwithammotheycanusetoconvincethoseotherparties.Also,trytomakethedecisioneasyforthem:e.g.,givethemanoptionthatmakesthemlookreallygoodinfrontoftheirboss.(F)Insistonusingobjectivecriteria.Wheneverpossible,lookforobjectivecriteriayoucanuseforcomingupwithoptions.E.g.,Insteadofmakingupapriceoffthetopofyourheadforacar,lookatwhatsimilarcarsaresellingforinotherdealershipsorwhatthevalueisinKelly'sBlueBook.-Objectivecriteriachangesitfromabattleofwillstoacommonbaselineyoucanbothuse.-Iftheothersidedoesn'twanttoplayalongandjusttossesoutpositions,askthemhowtheycameupwiththose:"E.g.,Iseeyou'reoffering$100,butwhat'sthetheorybehindthat?Howdidyoucomeupwiththatprice?Whatareyoubasingthaton?"(G)KnowyourBATNA.BATNA=BestAlternativeToaNegotiatedAgreement.Ifthenegotiationfallsthrough,youshouldalwaysknowinadvancewhatyourfallbackis—andwhatthefallbackisfortheotherside!-FlushoutyourBATNAinadvance.Infact,youmayhavetoactivelyworktoimproveyourBATNA.Thisisespeciallyimportantinnegotiationswherethepowerisnotequal:e.g.,asoloemployeenegotiatingwithahugecompanyisinamuchbetterpositioniftheyhaveseveraljoboffers,andtheirBATNAis"takeanotherjob,"ratherthanonejoboffer,wheretheBATNAis"beunemployed."-Flushouttheotherside'sBATNAtoo.Youshouldthinkthroughitinadvance,butalsodiscussitexplicitlywiththem.YoucanactuallyweakentheirBATNAbyforcingthemtoflushoutrealisticdetails:e.g.,"Ifyoudon'thiremeforthisrole,you'llhavetostartyourhiringprocessalloveragain,spendmonthsinterviewing,andthere'snoguaranteeyou'llfindsomeonenearlyasgood."IftheyperceivetheirBATNAasweaker,yourofferwillautomaticallybecomestronger.(H)Negotiationju-jitsu.Justbecauseyouwanttodoprinciplednegotiationdoesn'tmeantheothersidewill.Theymaywanttokeepusingpositionalbargaining,andindoingso,theywilltypicallyasserttheirposition,attackyourideas,andattackyoupersonally.Ifthishappens,don'tfightitheadon;instead,use"ju-jitsu"toredirectthemintotheprinciplednegotiationprocessyouwant.-Iftheykeepassertingtheirposition,listentoit,andinsteadofacceptingordenyingit,reframeitasoneoption.Askwhytheyhaveadoptedthatposition;trytounwrapifthatoptionmeetstheunderlyingneeds;playouttheposition,forcingthemtograpplewiththedetailstoseeifitworks;askwhattheoryorstandardstheyusedtocomeupwiththatposition."Ah,OK,soyou'reoffering$100.Sonowwehaveoneoptiononthetable.I'mcurious,why$100?Howdidyouarriveatthatnumber?Also,howdoesitworkinpractice?Ifweagreedto$100,whatdoesthatdoonyourside?HowwillitworkformeintermsofX,Y,andZ?"-Iftheyattackyourideas,don'tdefendyourideas,butinstead,invitethecriticismandadvice,andthenusethefeedbacktheyhavepresentedtobetterunderstandtheirinterests."Itlookslikeyou'repushingbackprettyhardonmysuggestiontopaymebasedontheaveragesalarydataIpresentedtoyouforthisrole.What'sthereasoningforthat?Isthereacompanypolicyonhowyoucalculatesalaries?Areyouworriedthatthissalaryishigherthanotherpeopleatthecompanywiththesameroleandthatwouldn'tbefair?Isthecompanystrugglingfinanciallyandcan'taffordthissalary?"-Iftheyattackyoupersonally,don'tdefendyourself.Instead,listen,andletthemletoffsteam.Askquestionstoletthemflushitallout.Whentheyhavespentthemselves,trytorecastthepersonalattackasanattackontheproblem.E.g.,Iftheycallyou"greedy"whenyouaskforahigherprice,trytorecastitaroundthemarket:"Look,Iknowit'stoughtobuildabusinessinthispartoftheworld,withpricessohigh.Ithinkwe'reallfacingit.Mycostsaresuperhightoo.We'llhavetofindsomewaytomakeitwork.Perhapsapaymentplanmighthelp?"-Ingeneral,yourmostpowerfulweaponistoaskquestions.Ifyoumakeastatement,theycanargueagainstitandpushback.Butyoucandeliverthesameinformationintheformofaquestion—especiallywithaphrasinglike"pleasecorrectmeifI'mwrong"—leavinglittletopushbackagainst;instead,itforcesthemtograpplewithwhatyou'reasking.Also,don'tforgettopause.Silenceisapowerfultool.E.g.,Insteadofastatementlike,"Youchargedme$Xforrent,butthelawsaysyoucan'tchargemorethan$Y,sothisisillegal!"youcouldtry,"PleasecorrectmeifI'mwrong,butIbelieveyouchargedus$X,right?Well,Isawherethatthelawsaysyoucan'tchargemorethan$Y,ordoIhavethatwrong?"(I)Onetextnegotiation.Onewaytodoanegotiation,especiallyiftherearemanypartiesinvolved,istohaveamediatorgoaroundtoeachpartyindividually,gatherrequirements,andthenproduceasingletext(asingledocument)thattriestobestmeetalltherequirements.Themediatorwillbringthistexttoeachpartyforfeedback,incorporatecorrectionsandsuggestions,andrepeattheprocess,untilthereisanagreementonpaperthatseemstobesttakeintoaccounteveryone'sneeds.Atthatpoint,themediatorgoesaroundonemoretime,andofferstoeachpartytomakeasingledecision:YesorNo.There'snonegotiatingbetweenparties,noendlessbattlesoverspecificpositions;justasingledocument,assembledbyrepeatedlycollectingrequirements&feedback,andasingledecision,toeithergowithwhatthedocumentsays,ornot.(J)Therearealwaystwonegotiations:negotiatingtheactualsubstance,andnegotiatingtherulesofthenegotiationitself.-Therulesareoftenimplicit,butyou'reusuallybettermakingthemexplicit.-Ifsomeoneisplayingtricks,callthemoutexplicitly:e.g.,"Lookslikeyouhaveagoodcop/badcopthinggoing.Doyouneedsometimetocometoanagreementamongstyourselves?"-Don'tattackpersonally.Questionthetactics,nottheperson.-Askforreciprocity."WillyousitinthissmallchairtomorrowifIsitinittoday?"-Usecontingencies."Oh,soyou'resureyourclientwillmakethesechildsupportpayments?100%sure?Ah,OK,sothenyou'llbeOKwithaddingacontingencywhereiftheymissthepayments,wegetsomeequityinthehouse?"-Don'tusethreats.Andcallouttheirs.Warningsarebetter,espforthingsyouaren'tdoingasadeliberatepunishment.E.g.,"Ifwedon'tagreetothis,thepressmayhaveafielddaywithit."-Don'tbeafraidofcommitments."Ionlynegotiatebasedonreasonandprinciple;notbasedonsomeoneelse'spromises.""Thatwasyourfinaloffer,butthatwasbeforewediscussedX,Y,andZ." ...more flag 5likes · Like  · seereview View1comment Aug26,2019 Obsidian ratedit itwasamazing  ·  reviewofanotheredition Shelves: favorites Thisonewasprettytechnical.Theauthorsreallybreakdownthethoughtprocessofhavingaprinciplednegotiationinsteadoftryingtonegotiateeither"soft"or"hard."Theyprovideavarietyofexamples/casestudiesthatemphasizethepoint.Notgoingtolie,thiswasabitdry,butverygoodbookifyouwanttoreadmoreaboutdifferentleadershipstyles."GettingtoYes"breaksdownkeyconceptsfromtheauthorssuchas"Don'tBargainOverPositions,""SeparatethePeoplefromtheProblem" Thisonewasprettytechnical.Theauthorsreallybreakdownthethoughtprocessofhavingaprinciplednegotiationinsteadoftryingtonegotiateeither"soft"or"hard."Theyprovideavarietyofexamples/casestudiesthatemphasizethepoint.Notgoingtolie,thiswasabitdry,butverygoodbookifyouwanttoreadmoreaboutdifferentleadershipstyles."GettingtoYes"breaksdownkeyconceptsfromtheauthorssuchas"Don'tBargainOverPositions,""SeparatethePeoplefromtheProblem"and"FocusonInterests,NotPositions."Througheachbreakdowntheygothroughandprovideanexampletoemphasistheirpoint.Ithoughtthisbookattimeswasdry,butIliketheconstantreinforcementthattheyaretryingtogettoinwhichthateverynegotiationthatyouhavewitheitheraboss,adirectreport,orpeer,youcanworktomakesurethatyouareprincipledinyournegotiationsanddon'tneedtostartfromasoftorhardposition.Ihaveabossrightnowthatallhedoesistrytoarguehispointwithourwholeteamandneverlistenstoathingwesay.Thatleadstoresentmentamongtherestofusandalsoanger.It'sfrustratingtoknowthatyouarebeingignoredsincethebosswantstodothingshisorherownwaywithouttakingintoconsiderationotherpeople.Itdidn'thelpinourcasethathewastotallywronginhisapproachandwe(theteam)arepayingforitnow.Oneofmyfavoritechaptersthoughwas"WhatifTheyAreMorePowerful?"orDevelopyourBATNA-BestAlternativeToaNegotiatedAgreement.AndbelievemeIpaidattentiontothisjustbecauseadeputyIworkforlikestowin.Youcanseehimjustthinkingabouthisretortwhenotherpeoplearespeaking.Drivesmeupthewall.Thischapterthoughtakesyouthroughstepssuchasprotectingyourself,thecostsofknowingyourbottomline,andknowingyourBATNA.Definitelyrecommendforaleadershipcourse.Andwillsayonceagainthisisprettydry. ...more flag 5likes · Like  · seereview Dec31,2011 Tamara ratedit itwasamazing Shelves: being-human, non-fiction Eye-opening.Now,howdoIrewriteallofmybadhabitstotakeadvantageoftheknowledgeinthisbook...?Couldhelpprovideafoundationfortheupcomingwebsiteredesigndiscussions.FavoriteTipsSeparatethepeoplefromtheproblem.Focusoninterests,notpositions.Generateavarietyofpossibilitiesbeforedecidingwhattodo.Insistthattheresultbebasedonsomeobjectivestandard.Whereperceptionsareinaccurate,youcanlookforwaystoeducate.Ifemotionsrunhigh,youcanfindw Eye-opening.Now,howdoIrewriteallofmybadhabitstotakeadvantageoftheknowledgeinthisbook...?Couldhelpprovideafoundationfortheupcomingwebsiteredesigndiscussions.FavoriteTipsSeparatethepeoplefromtheproblem.Focusoninterests,notpositions.Generateavarietyofpossibilitiesbeforedecidingwhattodo.Insistthattheresultbebasedonsomeobjectivestandard.Whereperceptionsareinaccurate,youcanlookforwaystoeducate.Ifemotionsrunhigh,youcanfindwaysforeachpersoninvolvedtoletoffsteam.Wheremisunderstandingexists,youcanworktoimprovecommunication.Butevenifblamingisjustified,itisusuallycounterproductive.Lookforopportunitiestoactinconsistentlywiththeirperceptions.Givethemastakeintheoutcomebymakingsuretheyparticipateintheprocess.Makeemotionsexplicitandacknowledgethemaslegitimate.Allowtheothersidetoletoffsteam.Bespecific.Concretedetailsnotonlymakeyourdescription[oftheproblem]credible,theyaddimpact.[Atthispoint,Igotlazyandstoppedreading.ButIreallyshouldcomebacktofinishatsomepoint.] ...more flag 4likes · Like  · seereview Nov30,2020 ANNEstories ratedit reallylikedit Shelves: business ThisbookislikeaslaponmyfaceaboutallthefailednegotiatingI‘vedoneinthepast.🥴HowIwishI‘vereadthisbookwaaaybefore.Itfeltliketheauthorisenumeratingallmymiscuesone-by-onetomyface.🤪HowIagreedtosomethingsthatwasandismarketlyunfavorabletome.😩Thatatsomepoint-Ijustwanttoshutthebookdownandrunandscream:Igetit,stop.😤🤬😅Ilearnedthehardway.AndIknowIcanusethelessonsfromallthatandthisbookfirmly,vividlywithhighobjecti ThisbookislikeaslaponmyfaceaboutallthefailednegotiatingI‘vedoneinthepast.🥴HowIwishI‘vereadthisbookwaaaybefore.Itfeltliketheauthorisenumeratingallmymiscuesone-by-onetomyface.🤪HowIagreedtosomethingsthatwasandismarketlyunfavorabletome.😩Thatatsomepoint-Ijustwanttoshutthebookdownandrunandscream:Igetit,stop.😤🤬😅Ilearnedthehardway.AndIknowIcanusethelessonsfromallthatandthisbookfirmly,vividlywithhighobjections-movingforward.Iknowwhattodonow.Haha,IsoundlikeI’mself-rationalizingmymistakes.Painfully.🥴Hence,thisbookintroducedmetoconceptssuchasbottomline,cognitivedissonance,BATNA(bestalternativetoanegotiatedagreement),negotiationJiu-Jitsuandmore.Highlyrecommendedtobusinessaspirants.Readreadreadandstudybeforehand.Knowwhatyouwanttocommunicateorfindout,andknowwhatpurposeaninformationwillserve.Preventionworksbest.Beaprinciplenegotiator,notapositional.🛎Noonecanmakeyouskillfullbutyourself.Bewell-preparedwithexternalmeasuresofvalue.Goodluck!🍀Take-aways:RealizethatBothsideshasmultipleinterests.Everyonejustwantstobetreatedequally.Sobothsidesshouldlookformutualgains,sharedinterests.Thatonemajorblockinproblemsolvingliesintheassumptionofa„fixedpie“.Thelessforyou,themoreforme.Neveryieldtopressure,onlytoprinciple.DevelopasolutionthatalsoappealstotheInterestoftheother.Themoreyoubuildastandardoffairness,themorelikelyyouaretoproduceafinalpackage.-thisis,theartofnegotiating.„“Likeitornot-Youareanegotiator.Wenegotiateinaninformalsensewithjustabouteveryonewemeetfrommorningtonight.Understandingisnotagreeing.Thepurposeofnegotiatingistoserveyourinterest.Thinkofwhatyouwanttowalkoutofthemeetingwith.Negotitionover:moneyvsbasichumanneeds.Ratherthanmakethingsdifficulttotheother,confrontthemwachoice-aspainlessaspossible.FaceSavingreflectspeople’sneedtoreconcilethestandtakeninanegotiationoranagreementwiththeirexistingprinciplesandtheirpastwordsanddeeds.TheoryofCognitiveDissonance-peopledislikeinconsistencyandwillacttoeliminateitbyattackingaproblem(notthepeople).BottomLine(lastprice)-apositionthatisnottobechange.Protectsyoufrommakingadecisionthatyoumayregretlater.It’srigid,non-negotiable.However,itmaykeepyoufromagreeingtoasolutionthatwouldwisetoaccept.Protectingyourselfagainstabadagreementisonething,makingthemostofyourassettoproduceagoodagreementisanother.(Likedamn,whatisbalance?)NegotiationJiu-Jitsu:focusonwhattheothermaydoandprepareforacounter.Iftheypushyou,don’tpushbackbutsidesteptheirattackanddeflectitagainsttheproblem...towardsamutualgain.Peopletendtofeeluncomfortablewsilence.Particularlyiftheyhavedoubtsaboutthemeritsofsomethingthey’vesaid. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Jun22,2020 HugoLester ratedit likedit Yeahlookqualityinformationbutjustquitealotofit.Notinthebestframeofmindtobereadingit....3starscheersRoger flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Sep25,2020 Zainab ratedit reallylikedit I'mgettinggenerouswithnon-fictionwriters.That'sweird.Ithinktextbooksarenotappreciatedenough.Itissortofatextbook.Veryacademicatitscore.Again,thankstotherandomstrangerforbuyingitforme.Itrarelysohappensthatyougetgoodbookswhenyouworkaroundbooks.Mostly,it'svampireromancesthatyouhavetopolitelyrefuseto.Anyway.It'sanythingbutvampireromance.ItactuallyaddedabitofpracticalvaluetothedisarrayofthoughtsIreckonattimes.Ifindi I'mgettinggenerouswithnon-fictionwriters.That'sweird.Ithinktextbooksarenotappreciatedenough.Itissortofatextbook.Veryacademicatitscore.Again,thankstotherandomstrangerforbuyingitforme.Itrarelysohappensthatyougetgoodbookswhenyouworkaroundbooks.Mostly,it'svampireromancesthatyouhavetopolitelyrefuseto.Anyway.It'sanythingbutvampireromance.ItactuallyaddedabitofpracticalvaluetothedisarrayofthoughtsIreckonattimes.Ifinditfunnyandrefreshingthattheyhavetermsdedicatedtoeverydayinsightswegetthroughourmodestexperiences.ButmostlyIfinditfunny.Notafanofbusinesshow-tosanddon'ts,buthello,ifyou'resomethingabouthighpolitics,I'llwelcomeyougladly.It'snotabouttraditionalhighpolitics.It'stooniceforthat.It'sideal.I'mokaywithidealifithasevenatinybitoftendencyforpracticality.Itdoes.I'mnotbigforstructuredreviews.Ipreferpersonalones.ButIthinkafewtakeawaysalwayshelpthosewholivestructuredlives.Again,totallyunnecessary.1.Don'tbargainoverpositions,itwilltakeyouawayfromtheactualsubstanceoftalksandyourrealachievablegoals/interests.Successivelydefendingyourpositionswilldrainyououtandmakeyoufeellikealoserifit'scompromisedtoreachanagreementwiththeotherparty.2.Moderationisthekeytoanydisputeresolutionmechanism(thebookdidn'tsaythat,butIimpliedfromitscontents).Andthere'smidwaybetweensoftandhardmethodsofnegotiationcalled'principlednegotiation'.Itiswhatthenamesuggests.Useasoftapproachwithpeoplebutsticktotheagreedprinciplesofthetalks.3.Ifapartydoesn'tplayalongonprincipledgrounds,bringtheir'tactics'toanopendiscussion.Butdon'tcriminalizethemorportraythemasliars.It'lldestroyyourchancestotalkinthefuture.Andtalksalwayscomearoundbecauseyouenteredthenegotiationprocessasyouthoughtitwasthebestwayoutofthatconflict.4.Readityourself.Ireaditthroughaninternationaltalksperspective,youmightfindtheprincipledmethodapplicabletoeverydayconflictsandinteractions.Myonlyproblemwiththebook:Umm.Itjustgetstooneo-liberalattimesespeciallywhentheauthorusesexamplesfromfamousworlddisputes.'Free-World'syndromeisrealintheWhiteworld.Butthat'saseparatedebatewe'llhavesomeotherday. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Viewall10comments Jul20,2010 Taka ratedit reallylikedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition Shelves: 2-nonfiction-you-must-read, other, japan_jul07-aug11 ExcellentFramework--Theframeworkofwhattheauthorscall"principlednegotiation"isprettymuchthesameastheframeworkof"crucialconversations."ItalsomesheswellwithDaleCarnegie'sframeworkofwinningfriendsandinfluencingpeopleandtosomeextent,ManuelJ.Smith'sHereBeDragonsandStephenCovey'sTheSevenHabitsofHighlyEffectivePeople.Itlaysoutapracticalapproachtonegotiationbasedonindependentstandardsoffairness.Andtodothis,youneedtoseparatethepe ExcellentFramework--Theframeworkofwhattheauthorscall"principlednegotiation"isprettymuchthesameastheframeworkof"crucialconversations."ItalsomesheswellwithDaleCarnegie'sframeworkofwinningfriendsandinfluencingpeopleandtosomeextent,ManuelJ.Smith'sHereBeDragonsandStephenCovey'sTheSevenHabitsofHighlyEffectivePeople.Itlaysoutapracticalapproachtonegotiationbasedonindependentstandardsoffairness.Andtodothis,youneedtoseparatethepeoplefromtheproblem,identifyinterestsbehindpositions,andworktogethertoinventcreativesolutions.Ifoundtheframeworktobebothpracticalandeffective,especiallywhereworkingtogetherwiththosewhoyou'renegotiatingwithandcomingupwithcreativesolutions.Negotiationdoesn'thavetobeazero-somegame;itcanverywellbewin-winaslongasyoukeepyourmindopentocorrectionsandtackledtheproblemstogether.Agoodintroductiononnegotiation. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Apr25,2016 KirtidaGautam ratedit itwasamazing  ·  reviewofanotheredition Shelves: chakra-3 IamresearchingfortheBook3YinYangwhichisallaboutpower,politics,andsocialinfluence.ThereforeGettingtoYeswasinmyTo-Readlistforquitesometimenow.ButasIampreparingforanimportantupcomingnegotiation,Idecidedtoreaditurgentlyandfinishedin5days.(whichwasnotdifficultconsideringit'soneofthemostinterestingbooksIhavereadthisyear)It'samust-read,andImeanMUST-READbookforanypersonwhoisdealingwithanykindofnegotiation--whichmean IamresearchingfortheBook3YinYangwhichisallaboutpower,politics,andsocialinfluence.ThereforeGettingtoYeswasinmyTo-Readlistforquitesometimenow.ButasIampreparingforanimportantupcomingnegotiation,Idecidedtoreaditurgentlyandfinishedin5days.(whichwasnotdifficultconsideringit'soneofthemostinterestingbooksIhavereadthisyear)It'samust-read,andImeanMUST-READbookforanypersonwhoisdealingwithanykindofnegotiation--whichmeans-amustreadforEVERYONEbecauseasahumanwenegotiateeveryday.Justfewsecondsback,Inegotiatedwithmy4yearsoldthatshewillletmework(Shesaid,shewouldifIwillletherwatchRamayana,animationmovie--shenegotiatedherway)--so,seenegotiationispartofourdaytodaylives.Thereisnopointinbeinganostrichandsay,"Inmywork,Idon'thavetodealwithnegotiation,whyshouldIreadthisbook."Because,letmebreakthenews--YOUDONEGOTIATE--somightaswelldoitbetter.Must.Read.Book. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview View1comment Jan26,2018 James ratedit itwasamazing Inabetterworld,_GettingToYes_wouldberequiredreadinginsecondaryschool.Everypageisfullofwisdomandsuggestionsforhandlinginterpersonalinteractions—ornegotiations,sincemostbidirectionalcommunicationisinsomesenseanegotiation.Assomeonewhonegotiatesprofessionally,I’vefoundthephilosophyof_GettingToYes_tobeexactlyinsyncwithmyownstyle.I’vegivencopiesofthebooktopeoplewhomImentorandeventothosewithwhomInegotiate.Theaudioversion Inabetterworld,_GettingToYes_wouldberequiredreadinginsecondaryschool.Everypageisfullofwisdomandsuggestionsforhandlinginterpersonalinteractions—ornegotiations,sincemostbidirectionalcommunicationisinsomesenseanegotiation.Assomeonewhonegotiatesprofessionally,I’vefoundthephilosophyof_GettingToYes_tobeexactlyinsyncwithmyownstyle.I’vegivencopiesofthebooktopeoplewhomImentorandeventothosewithwhomInegotiate.TheaudioversionIlistenedtothistimeisanupdatededitionwithsomefresherexamplesandupdatednumbers.It’sstillaclassic. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Jun03,2007 PeepLaja ratedit itwasamazing Recommendsitfor: peoplethatwanttoimproveontheirnegotiationskills Thisisabookaboutnegotiations.Wenegotiatealmosteveryday,whetheritsabouttheideayoucameupwithatwork,whichmovietoseeinthecinemaorconvincingsomebodytodosomething.Forthosewhowantdeeperinsightsintotheartofprincipalbasednegotiations,thisisagem.IhaveusedtheknowledgeIgainedconsciouslysomanytimes.IofteninthemiddleofnegotiationsfindmyselfthinkingoftheprincipalsIlearned,andhaveusedthemverysuccessfully.Thereisnoneedtowast Thisisabookaboutnegotiations.Wenegotiatealmosteveryday,whetheritsabouttheideayoucameupwithatwork,whichmovietoseeinthecinemaorconvincingsomebodytodosomething.Forthosewhowantdeeperinsightsintotheartofprincipalbasednegotiations,thisisagem.IhaveusedtheknowledgeIgainedconsciouslysomanytimes.IofteninthemiddleofnegotiationsfindmyselfthinkingoftheprincipalsIlearned,andhaveusedthemverysuccessfully.Thereisnoneedtowastetimeonpositionalbargaining,thereisabetterway. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Jun20,2018 Mia ratedit itwasok Maybeappropriatehelpforthepersonwhohasneverreallystoppedtoreflectontheefficacyoftheircurrentthinkingorbehaviorwheninvolvedinconflictornegotiation.Forreaderswhoaren'tstartingfromscratchwhenitcomestolearningaboutmediationandnegotiation,thereareprobablymorenuancedanddetailedinstructionmanualsoutthere. Maybeappropriatehelpforthepersonwhohasneverreallystoppedtoreflectontheefficacyoftheircurrentthinkingorbehaviorwheninvolvedinconflictornegotiation.Forreaderswhoaren'tstartingfromscratchwhenitcomestolearningaboutmediationandnegotiation,thereareprobablymorenuancedanddetailedinstructionmanualsoutthere. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Mar03,2019 Diego ratedit reallylikedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition Shelves: usc-mba, business-self-improvement Classassigned.ThisbookisessentialreadingforNegotiationskill.Iwillbereferencingthisoften.Youcanfillthegapsonhowyoucurrentlynegotiate.Itreallyshouldalsobecalledhowtoexecutedemocracyanddiplomacywithoutalienatingyourpositiverelationships.Sidenote,everypoortacticlistediswhatTrumpclaimsisnegotiating.Hehasnoclue. flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Jul16,2016 Charlene ratedit reallylikedit Shelves: decision-making Iwasshockedtoseethatthiswasfirstwrittenin1991.Notonlyisitrelevanttoday,itisafarmorebalancedandfairapproachtonegotiating.Nosensationalism.Simplygoodadviceabouthowtothinkandtalktootherswhentryingtocompromise. flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Jun02,2017 BartoszMajewski ratedit itwasamazing Shelves: business Greatbookaboutbasicsofnegotiations.It'sfullofcasestudiesandpresentsabasicframeworkforgettingthingsdonebyfocusingnegotiatorsontheprobleminsteadofoneanother.Highlyrecommended. Greatbookaboutbasicsofnegotiations.It'sfullofcasestudiesandpresentsabasicframeworkforgettingthingsdonebyfocusingnegotiatorsontheprobleminsteadofoneanother.Highlyrecommended. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Dec17,2019 Trung ratedit reallylikedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition 3.5starsroundedup.Notsureifit'sbecauseofthetranslationbutthewritingstyleisnotpersuasive. 3.5starsroundedup.Notsureifit'sbecauseofthetranslationbutthewritingstyleisnotpersuasive. ...more flag 3likes · Like  · seereview Dec05,2017 sevdah addedit Astheauthorwrotetowardstheending,"Thisbookisabouthowto"win"thatimportantgame—howtoachieveabetterprocessfordealingwithyourdifferences.".Notabouthowtowinanargumentoranysuchthing.Itmakesnoclaimatintroducingbrandnewideas,butaimssimplyatorganizingalotofwhatyoumayalreadyknowaregoodorbadpracticesinnegotiation,andstructuringthereasonswhytheywork-ordon't.Iwalkedoutwith6pagesofnotes,soformeitwasworthit. Astheauthorwrotetowardstheending,"Thisbookisabouthowto"win"thatimportantgame—howtoachieveabetterprocessfordealingwithyourdifferences.".Notabouthowtowinanargumentoranysuchthing.Itmakesnoclaimatintroducingbrandnewideas,butaimssimplyatorganizingalotofwhatyoumayalreadyknowaregoodorbadpracticesinnegotiation,andstructuringthereasonswhytheywork-ordon't.Iwalkedoutwith6pagesofnotes,soformeitwasworthit. ...more flag 2likes · Like  · seereview Dec15,2018 VikasAgarwal ratedit itwasamazing IreadthisbookwithonecoursewhichiamdoingonCourseraonnegotiationandfounditveryuseful.Itgivesyouinsightthathowwrongiwasinvariousnegotiation.Obviouslyineedtopractisetheselearningsinmydailylifesoicanbebetternegotiator. flag 2likes · Like  · seereview Aug31,2021 BellaDuncan ratedit itwasok Havingread‘NeverSplittheDifference’,thisreadseemedabitoutdated.IhadtoreadthisbookforadisputeresolutionsubjectatUniversityandwhilstitprovidedsomegoodexamples,notallweresuperstraightforward.IwoulddefinitelyreadNeverSplittheDifferenceoverthisbook. flag 2likes · Like  · seereview Jan06,2022 tahneegerman ratedit reallylikedit 4.5/5,reallygoodbookonnegotiationandcommunication.kindagaveme‘neversplitthedifferencevibes.’ifyou,likeme,areonaconstantquesttobeabettercommunicator,thisbookisforu. flag 2likes · Like  · seereview Sep14,2019 PapLőrinc ratedit reallylikedit Alwaysseektheunfulfilledneedbehindtheopponent'smanifestation. Alwaysseektheunfulfilledneedbehindtheopponent'smanifestation. ...more flag 2likes · Like  · seereview Feb26,2020 NickPapandreou addedit  ·  reviewofanotheredition fivestar flag 2likes · Like  · seereview «previous123456789…next» newtopicDiscussThisBook topics  posts  views  lastactivity    DichvulamluanvantotnghiepdaihoctaiLuanVan24 2 4 Oct17,201909:53AM   RequiredReadinginDivroce 1 10 Sep06,201602:11AM   EntrepreNerds: CommunicatingEffectively 1 16 Feb13,201311:45PM   Moretopics... Share RecommendIt  |  Stats  |  RecentStatusUpdates Readersalsoenjoyed Seesimilarbooks… VideosAboutThisBook Addacomment Morevideos... Genres Business 1,728users Nonfiction 835users Psychology 365users SelfHelp 344users Leadership 245users Language> Communication 206users Business> Management 170users SelfHelp> PersonalDevelopment 145users Buisness 69users Law 62users Seetopshelves… AboutRogerFisher RogerFisher 197 followers RogerFisheristheSamuelWillistonProfessorofLawEmeritus,DirectoroftheHarvardNegotiationProject,andthefounderoftwoconsultingorganizationsdevotedtostrategicadviceandnegotiationtraining.Seealso:RogerFisher(academic)onWikipedia RogerFisheristheSamuelWillistonProfessorofLawEmeritus,DirectoroftheHarvardNegotiationProject,andthefounderoftwoconsultingorganizationsdevotedtostrategicadviceandnegotiationtraining.Seealso:RogerFisher(academic)onWikipedia ...more BooksbyRogerFisher More… News&Interviews12BestsellingAuthorsShareExclusiveInsightsonTheirBiggestBooks Themindsofauthorscanbemysteriousplaces.Howdotheycomeupwithallthoseplottwists?Whatinspiredthemtocreatetheirmostbeloved...Readmore...25likes·0comments TriviaAboutGettingtoYes:N... Notriviaorquizzesyet.Addsomenow» QuotesfromGettingtoYes:N... “Peoplelistenbetteriftheyfeelthatyouhaveunderstoodthem.Theytendtothinkthatthosewhounderstandthemareintelligentandsympatheticpeoplewhoseownopinionsmaybeworthlisteningto.Soifyouwanttheothersidetoappreciateyourinterests,beginbydemonstratingthatyouappreciatetheirs.” — 23likes “Anymethodofnegotiationmaybefairlyjudgedbythreecriteria:Itshouldproduceawiseagreementifagreementispossible.Itshouldbeefficient.Anditshouldimproveoratleastnotdamagetherelationshipbetweentheparties.” — 11likes Morequotes… Welcomeback.JustamomentwhilewesignyouintoyourGoodreadsaccount.